only the loveless will comprehend love in its true colours.




BURN BURN BURN! HAHAHA.
there you are you pathetic no-life loser.
what are you? you cant even explain your thoughts.
nobody believes you, nobody heeds your words.
hahaha.
well well. you lowly crap.
you are at the botton of human heirachy, your life
brings you no enjoyment.
you cant even tell people things, they will always
fail to understand you. nobody will understand.
what? you think you are better than me?
im just a feeling? no~ you are wrong.
im well alive. i am your heart




if you really must know how i feel,
about this whole matter,
yes, im sorry to have overlooked that
but i feel more indignant that
you, failed to tell me
before you persecuted me, i thought
we had it clear that you'd speak your
unhappiness, but noooo, you did that only
after you so hastily already decided that
i needed to be taught a lesson.
right...

then, you didnt realise what it meant
to actually take down something you have
hanged up.. it means it no longer applies,
when you keep something, at least it still
means you're holding it with you
but once you take it down, it means its gone
so your idea of teaching me a lesson is showing
me that you're telling others that you've broken up?

i know, writing this is unfair to you too
but have you any idea i cant sleep tonight?
but i dont wanna torture you,
you aint feeling well and you need rest.

sorry.




you, trying not to depend on me,
have set yourself on a road,
way steeper than any you've climbed

because you think, that if you, try to
meet some expectations, then i maybe,
just maybe, you won't look weak,
but now, what has happened?

tell me, why does it have to be this way?
i turned up yesterday, against all of my
will. because hope upon hope,
i would reach you, no, in the end?
you thought i was there to hawk over you.

i was on the verge of killing,
and if i hadn't promised never to turn
to violence, unless it's to protect myself,
i would have. i would have shouted at you,
i would have burned the pub.

but i didn't because i wanted to talk to you.
why do you have to insist on hiding things?
why do you think that if at the canal,
i can get you drinks, i would prevent you
from drinking if you wanted?

i only remind you about it, the day after.
but you failed to realise that, i have
NEVER stopped you from a drop of drink.
pressure? i never pressured you.
unless my presense in itself did
THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU NOT TELL ME
IN THE FIRST PLACE THAT YOU WERE GOING
TO FUCKING DRINK AT A PUB?
its easy as hell to disappear.
but i didn't do so. cause i loved you.

you think i don't know something's going on?
you think i didn't know? what? xr can't keep a
lie for fuck's sake. insisting that i shouldnt go,
making dumbass decisions for me w/o
informing me? i won't find something wrong?

disappointments after disappointments,
i hate it when i hear my buddy's boyfriend say,
"lynard deserves better, she's not worthy"
cause to me, you are worthy.. more than worthy

but i get very disappointed when i see that
sometimes, your priorities, does not include me.

the problem may be because we set too many
ideals and because we thought too much
about the future and the past that we forgot
the present, the 'present' is called 'present'
because its a gift, and every moment we are
together should be considered a gift,
a novelty. maybe if we get to start over again,
we should just keep things simple
and focus on our present state.

it pains me, to know that i have someone
but i can't hold her, to know that
she is 1st, but i am not.
i set that break for your sake honey,
for you to see if i am number one
or just no one.

i already said, you may choose to end the
break at anytime and start all over again
in a relationship or as friends




hurt, all you ever knew was hurt
what about happiness?
where is your faith and determination?
i told you it was all a farce
you never cared did you?
you never cared if something would burn you

you knew your chest hurts at times
literally.
but now, they hurt all the time,
emotionally.

you don't want to take a break?
you crave for human touch and so you
appear promiscuous.
you are supposed to give her security
what the hell are you doing?

you cant expect to have comfort all
the time, you knew the heart could
be treacherous, you knew your control
wasnt that good under too much stress
cause you dont want to die,
you say it like you dont mind but you
do, you cared about death
you dont want to see him knocking
at your doorstep and the name he reads
out happens to be a name so familiar
you dont want to see it.




you want to know what's going on now?
since my mom stayed home
and she makes an effort to catch up,
she' slowly being brought into my life.

it's just that, all she has to do is to talk,
im starting to feel more alright about
leaving my door open,
i dont really care if she can see anymore
no i dont.

yes,
it's my fault, i know you feel weird when
you meet my friends. there's not a thing
i can do.. im not all powerful, i dont know
how to change an awkward situation..

that's why i dont pull you to meet my friends
anymore?

and as my mom gets closer,
i want you to get closer too.
im breaking the barrier. and i guess my mom's
pretty satisfied by it.
i dont know if you really wanna compare it that
way. i guess not...
but i hope, in the years to come, or hopefully,
the months, you'd ease up..

you ask me to relax.. but that's what
i want you to do... to relax and to forget
about trying to protect yourself
cause.. im trying my best to let people in,
and i hope you'd do the same.
i am opening my eyes, experiencing new stuff
and im sure recently you are too.
accept, just like how earth accepts life.

i hope for the best.
and im trying to be a better son,
a better bf, a better person.

and im changing my lifestyle alot.
for what? for the simple word; us




that's the smell of burning flesh!
you knew that smell yet you followed
you idiot.
why wear such a huge shoe when it
doesnt even fit? you fucking retard.
how many times do you need to trip
before you'd learn?
people say determination is good
but you ain't determined you are
rash and completely clueless.
hell you cant even see for goodness sake
you are still so caught up by your fears,
you cant see and you cant hear her pleas
what is wrong with you?
you motherfucking worthless shitfilled
pit. what?
what's the pit for?
your worthless ass just got more worthless
when it's filled by shit.

damnit, what's that strong front for?
you know you are weak, nobody knows you
nobody knows how afraid you are.
you are the weakest inside. but no one has
seen that the jester is craving for attention
although everyone loves him,
the jester is crying. yet no one sees